Free To Be Lovely

With Halloween approaching and Halloween decorations everywhere, I am reminded of a fear I have. While I can watch zombie movies and sleep like a baby, I have a hard time with haunted houses. I'm pretty sure this was because I was lost in one as a kid (or at least it felt that way). I think I was 8 years old. I had taken about five steps into the haunted house and barely turned a corner when I became so frightened that I turned around and ran out of the front door. Every year I ask myself if my feelings about haunted houses are worth overcoming. And, every year I tell myself that it is a good thing that I'm afraid of people jumping out at me in the dark...this is healthy. But, I still wonder if I should try to get over it. Fears and phobias are strange things and can develop overnight. Normal fears can actually be healthy and help protect you from danger. Phobias, on the other hand, generally are not and are often excessive, irrational, and get in the way of normal l...

Ambleside Park Imagine if you will, you are in a beautiful park in Vancouver, British Columbia. Let's say Ambleside Park in West Vancouver. From this park, you can look across the water and see the amazing Lions Gate Bridge and Vancouver's famous Stanley Park. You can also look out onto Burrard Inlet, which opens up into the Strait of Georgia. Incredible! It's a nice day, not too hot, and not too cold. The sun plays hide and seek with the clouds keeping the temperature just right. This is where we were and how it was on Saturday, August 17th at the classic rock festival, Rock Ambleside Park 2019. On this perfect day, at this perfect venue, we saw four of Canada's best rock bands: Pat Travers, Sass Jordan, SAGA, and Tom Cochrane with Red Rider. Who??? If you aren't Canadian (or maybe if you are), there is a chance that you won't know these accomplished Canadian classic and progressive rock bands. But, if you heard Sass Jordan's powerful, gravelly vo...

A few weekends ago, a girlfriend from Vancouver, Canada came to visit with her family. I've known this friend for almost 28 years; We met just after we graduated from university. It's neat because both she and her husband are the same age as Karl and I and our friendship has stood the test of time through the many different seasons and challenges of life. We, all four of us, are on the cusp of turning 50. And so, as the boys chatted about aging, so too did us, girls. And it was refreshing...and helpful. We talked about going gray and dealing with wrinkles. We shared our fears of being marginalized as we get older and discussed how to change our attitudes about aging. It was positive and I felt like I wasn't alone. Truth is, I see more and more women embracing their gray hair, and I love it. I started letting "the wisdom" (as my hairstylist calls it) out about 5 years ago and have never regretted it. I want to share what I've learned about going gray in...

How do you know someone is on the Keto diet? They tell you! Yes, I have joined the ranks of people who are "doing Keto" and am loving it. Karl and I started doing it together in January and are reaping all the benefits toted by experts and enthusiasts--the weight and fat loss, clarity of mind, long-lasting energy, and disappearance of sugar cravings and feeling hungry all the time. Keto goodness! For those who aren't familiar with this diet, it is a high-fat diet. It is similar to the Atkins Diet, but different in that the main thing is the fat, followed by protein and veg. Most fruits are off limits because of the sugar content. And, of course, no processed foods, grains, legumes, and sugar. We will do some berries here and there, and tomato, but usually the quantities are small and we eat enough to get a variety of nutrients. There are variations on how much sugar people choose to eat. Karl and I are limiting our sugar to 25 grams of net carbs, which means, we tak...

I really enjoy shopping online. For me, the convenience of shopping when I want is huge. Of course, I have to admit, I also like receiving packages in the mail, especially when I’ve forgotten what I’ve ordered. The other thing I get excited about is finding a deal. I never want to pay full price for anything. Here are some tips for finding discounts. 1. Search for coupon and discount codes online.   When I find something I want to buy, I always open a separate browser and search for a coupon code for that company. Often I will find a code that gives me an extra 10-20% off or free shipping. 2. Shop around. This might be a no brainer, but I’ve found the same item at different places having different prices. Lately, I’ve found Amazon to have lower prices on items that are more expensive in a physical store. This isn’t always the case though. I usually check out a few sites, which include Amazon as well as the manufacturer of the item. 3. Find out what your friends are buying...

    Recently, a girlfriend shared with me about her struggles with work. She was tired of working long hours, feeling like she had to work on vacation, and feeling unsupported by her boss and project manager. She told me she wished something, anything, would happen to her so she wouldn’t have to go into work. Right away, I heard warning bells, and it brought me back to a time when I had had similar thoughts. Feeling powerless and stuck in a situation where you can’t see a way out is truly terrible. It was fortunate that this friend decided to talk to me about it. About 20 years ago, I had been in the same place, and she had helped me through it. At that time, my work, home life, and health weren’t functioning well. I was overwhelmed and tired. I felt stuck. I didn't share the details of what I felt with her at that time, but I did tell her I was struggling. I still remember how she listened and shared words of loving encouragement. Who knew, that one day I would be a...

For 3 weeks, over Christmas and New Year's, I went to Zambia and Zimbabwe to visit family. I had never been to Zambia before and I hadn't been to Zimbabwe in about 21 years. These countries were shocking and beautiful at the same time. While in both countries, I saw police asking people directly for money at police checks, lots of garbage strewn about, and plenty of non-functioning toilets. In Zimbabwe, I saw cars lined up around blocks waiting to get gas and heard countless comments about how hard it is to get anything done without bribing someone. Despite this, my extremely generous African family welcomed our motley crew of 7 with open arms and showed us all there was to love about both countries. They gave us a taste of what everyday life was like and took us to various game parks, tourist sites, and local hangouts. In addition to this, I saw some of the world's most beautiful women. With their brightly colored clothing, fitted dresses, strong-looking bod...